The forever mask | The press

“Let’s see, what bag did I put it in?” †

Posted at 7:00 am

You just arrived at the supermarket, you have to wear a mask to get in.

“Should I have one in the tank somewhere?” †

You’ll find one under the trouser saver mat. It will do the job. The elastic is a little loose, you twist it, you make two turns on the ears, it’s perfect. Gone are the days of hygienically treating medical masks. We’ll be back at some point. You rush to choose a salad, before the fog in your glasses prevents you from seeing it. Too late. The fog lifted. You take off your mask and use it to wipe your glasses. It’s still practical. Then put your glasses and mask back on. It won’t be easy!

You’ve been living with that piece of cloth for over two years. It’s been your most stable relationship for a long time. Who would have believed it? Especially since you were forbidden to go out with him in the beginning. Don’t wear a mask! Too dangerous ! You touch it with your hands and increase your chances of contracting the virus. But why do hospital staff wear them? Because. Because what? Because that’s all.

Then, a few weeks later, change of speech. You must wear the mask under all circumstances.

Even Health Canada recommends keeping it on during sex. the 51and shade of gray or light blue.

The mask has become the most sought-after item in the world. Bruce Willis and Tom Cruise’s commandos are tasked with hijacking cargo. No country wanted to lose face. We spent an insane amount of money to get this piece of fabric as small as bikini bottoms. And one day the face covering shortage was solved. Poached everywhere. Take one to enter and another to exit. Not the N95’s of course, but the others, the common ones that aren’t advanced enough to have a letter and a number. Today we are more afraid of running out of chips than of masks.

We thought for a while that the mask was going to be trendy. The big brands had fun releasing their brand line, the big companies distributed them in their colors, but fashion quickly ran out. No one is being fooled, it’s still a vulgar drool screen.

What we had become accustomed to. So much so that when we meet someone without a mask in a public place, we go into a state of shock. He would be completely naked with only a mask, we wouldn’t care. The tip of the nose and mouth have become the new organs to be hidden.

We can all brag about being good responsible citizens and diligently wearing a face covering, but we still have to admit that we wear it a bit haphazardly. We all suffer from the syndrome coach hockey to varying degrees. the coach hockey player who systematically takes off his mask to scream into his players’ ears and put it back on when he has nothing left to say.

We, unlike coaches, we understood that when propelling sputters, it is necessary to adjust the mask properly. The problem is that the pandemic has made us realize that we’re not just talking about the mouth, we’re also talking about the nose. The movement of our lips also causes the movement of our nose, causing our mask to slide down our nostrils. We spend our conversations cleaning up the laundry. Which caused us to develop a nervous tic.

So much so that on the day we are freed from the mask, we continue to raise an invisible cloth while talking.

But will we ever be rid of it? It is Sunday that the Dr Boileau will advise the government whether or not to lift the obligation to wear the mask as of 14 May. Opinions on this are divided. Some say it’s high time to expose Quebec, as well as Prince Edward Island, the only places in North America where it shouldn’t be. Others say that the virus is still circulating a lot and that it is better to be careful.

We don’t know anymore. We can’t wait to get it off our faces, but we wouldn’t hate it if other people kept wearing it. It protects us not only from their COVID-19, but also from their bad breath, ugly nose hair and crazy looks. It’s not nothing.

You finally get out of the supermarket. After you put the bags in the car, you go home. You cook dinner, call the kids, and everyone comes to the table. You come to eat… Oops, the bite won’t go away, you forgot to take off your mask, from the supermarket.

We know something is really part of our lives when we don’t forget to put it on, but forget to take it off.

15 more days. Maybe…

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